So much change going on ...I need a change

So lots has happened and I don't want to post it all. Four instructors later a lot of ups and down ( I think more downs) and that is where you'd find me. I have some good instructors now working for me in Jaden's program that I feel confident with where the program is going. Jaden, on the other hand, I'm not confident on where he is going. His behavior has been the most terrifying roller coaster ride I've been on. There are some ups but there are a Heck of a lot of steep downs. Yes, he's almost potty (not poopy) trained, and is reading, and more able to make complete sentences that express good thoughts but.... I say but... He is stimming like never before and he echos physically and verbally so much that I feel like I have a paid mime following me everywhere. He licks things, he smells things, his OCD is off the charts. Every door, drawer, compartment have to be closed; drops of water wiped up; rugs and pictures places straight. Where did this OCD Mime come from?!

His behavior took a bad turn about 2 months ago ( more violent and endless screaming) we think after he ate some Swedish Fish (for potty training), which is full of no, no red dye. Then another diet was suggested and I started it promptly as soon as I could. The Diet is called the GAPS Diet. It is the SCD diet on steroids. I had to make friends with a rancher and a butcher and spend that much more money at whole foods to get it going. So 1/4 of a cow later and a bunch of bone marrow the diet is going full steam. Yes, we have seen improvement in his violent behavior but like I said I'm dealing with this new creature. So I'm going back to the intro diet of GAPS diet to see if that will help with the strange behaviors.

As for school, he got the Okay to attend mainstream Kindergarten but I may have to hire a shadow for him. Which is fine. I didn't want him going to a special ed kindergarten because he is so far ahead of his peers academically that he might tank in a limited environment.

As for Brinn, at first the school district said she didn't qualify for any special services. This made me upset because I could ask Brinn how old she is and she would reply "Old. or Brinn Rogers." Um, I don't think so. So with help from a parent advocate with the school district and a few phone calls later the district head of preschool and kindergarten allowed Brinn further testing. And of course Brinn was allowed into the special ed preschool and get an IEP (Individualized Education Plan). Thank goodness. But she is my super star. Yes, we have work to do but I don't stress about her future as I do for Jaden. Lately, I'm in tears every night worrying about these new strange behaviors and the lack of progress in certain areas (potty training).
Poor Brinn hasn't been getting as much attention as I give to Jaden. It is always last minute that I get my RDI homework done and it is because she learns quickly on her own that she is progressing quickly.

So my schedule basically consists of ABA, RDI, and cooking like they did 100 years ago. I can't use a microwave. Yeah, chew on that. Everything has to be fresh, frozen, free range,  pasture-grass fed, and named Bessie.

I do have to say, that it was funny when I bought the cow, I received a picture of the cow. It brought a sick smile to my face as how they thought it might be appealing to see what your cow looked like before it met my friend  The Butcher.

I've been doing this for almost two years now and I'm starting to get that burnt out feeling where despair starts to creep in a little more often. I told Jason the perfect break from this would be a long road trip to the coast with music blaring and me screaming/singing to the music at the top of my lungs until I arrive at a sandy beach with warm sun. ...Maybe Someday.

So this is what is going on right now. I just try to make it a day at a time. I'm not going to picture Jaden being 16 and having the same tantrum he had earlier today at the store....that terrifies me. I may have to take up weight training.